More info than you wanted about my annual exam

I promise not to get too detailed here, but yesterday was my annual "women's doctor" visit and it was entertaining for a few reasons.

First of all, it was the first such visit I have really wanted to go to, and I owe it all to my children. I don't know if it was a full moon or if the merciful cold front that came through yesterday messed with their little psyches or if they just hate me, but yesterday my two boys were absolutely as bad as it was possible for them to be. My 4 year old literally screamed for 2.5 hours about nothing, and much of that time was during a trip to a public place. Lovely. My 2 year old pinched my neck so hard that it looks like I have a hickey. Now, I'll be the first to admit that my kids have great potential for mischief and mayhem, but the sheer effort they put into yesterday's shenanigans was noteworthy. By the time my doctor appointment rolled around, I was more than ready to ditch the kids with their unsuspecting father and go anywhere at all, as long as it wasn't with them - even the doctor.

Reason 2 - my doctor is a very, very (very) small man. Maybe 4'5, and positively dainty in build. He is dear and funny and completely non-threatening. His only shortcoming is a tendency to ramble on and on with nostalgic stories that would be very interesting in another context, but are distracting in the extreme under exam circumstances. He also lacks the ability to multitask, so I laid captive for 20 minutes, prepared for the exam and wearing a large paper napkin, and listen to his stories about boarding school in India.

Not that I'm especially looking forward to next year, but since I have to do it anyway, I might as well make the best of it!